I'm hungry. But, I think I'll wait another hour to boil up my ramen noodles for lunch. It's deadline day at the paper and I want to be sure I don't eat too soon and end up wanting a snack between lunch and dinner.
This week, I can't "afford" one.
When I told our kids that their dad and I agreed to take the "Food Stamp Challenge," they were eager to jump on board.
"We'll help you. Don't worry," Chelsea declared, seeing the anxiety in my face.
"I can eat oatmeal every day," Stuart jumped in. "I can eat it for every meal."
"P-B and J is cheap," Colton added. "I can live on those for a week, no problem."
"This isn't a survival game," I tried to explain. Sure, technically, we'd all live through the week if we ate oatmeal, peanut butter, and ramen noodles, but the goal wasn't simply survival. We needed to do our best to create healthy meals on $3 per person/per day-the average food stamp budget.
We had to plan, I told them. We had to really think ahead and write down every purchase. The aim of the challenge is to raise awareness of the issues facing the poor who receive food stamps to help pay for their food.
We started a week early by writing the prices of food on everything we could. Bananas were 22 cents apiece. Fuji apples were running 85 cents-nearly the cost of a whole meal. Every serving of milk was about 25 cents. Watermelon would certainly be off limits. And, ultimately, so would, oranges, grapes, nectarines, and plums. We couldn't wedge them into $3 a day. We even skipped carrots. And Tony's gluten-free bread and cereal that he relies on because of celiac disease? Well, he would have to make do without.
I remember when we were kids-my two brothers, sister and me. Mom would load us up in the car and first make sure she had all her coupons, then head to the bank. Hopefully, we'd have enough for a grocery shopping trip. Mom always looked worried.
When fruit was on sale, she would stock up, obviously thrilled to be able to fill the bowl on the counter.
Within hours of arriving home, we kids would gobble everything down. Often, my mom had tears in her eyes as she watched the fruit disappear.
We'd tease her that you can't bronze the fruit, preserving it forever like a pair of baby shoes. It was to be eaten. Fresh.
But, oh, if she could have preserved it just for a few days. Just to know there was fresh fruit available for her kids, on hand, whenever they wanted it. Whenever they were hungry.
Looking in our cupboard, I felt like my mom.
We'd locked up every other cupboard with cable ties so that we wouldn't be tempted by the bounty we are blessed with-cans of vegetables, soup, jellies, tuna, olives, salsa-stocked up and ready at a moment's notice.
Our tiny food stamp cupboard, filled with $68 worth of food (we left $7 in our budget for emergencies and additional milk), was pretty bleak. Oatmeal, two small cans of tuna, rice, beans, noodles. Everything was purchased on sale. Everything was written down. There wasn't room for error. Our pork would have to last three days. Did we buy enough cheese or too much? Maybe we should have skipped the tuna and bought more rice. There would be no boxed cereal in the cupboard, for sure.
At most meals, the kids started eating first. Tony and I didn't dig in until we were certain there was enough to go around. Sometimes, there wasn't.
We could do it-survive the week- but it wasn't at all easy, especially with our hectic lives. When I mistakenly thought I could make it through a school board meeting without eating dinner until afterward, I found myself with a headache and starting to sweat. By habit, I dashed out of the meeting room and to the drink machine for an orange juice.
$1.25. I was about to faint.
It would have to come out of the emergency reserve. I felt guilty. I confessed my lack of planning when I got home. Colton offered to give up breakfast, but Tony assured him everything would work out fine. That's why we had $7 on hand.
I couldn't make that mistake again. When I did, I went hungry. The excessive planning made me weary. I missed fresh fruit and vegetables. I longed for lean meat.
Tony was great with the record-keeping and coming up with creative meals spun out of potatoes, eggs, and a sprinkle of frozen veggies. Shopping required a notebook and calculator and many returns to various aisles to rethink our selections. The kids rarely complained, and nodded somberly when reminded that this is just five days, not a way of life, as it is for so many of our neighbors and families across the globe.
As I write this, I have about 12 hours left in the "Food Stamp Challenge." We'll make it. But the challenge for other families-too many families-will continue long after we unclip the ties on our kitchen cupboards.